Tag: feels

A Tension

She loves the attention –
The tension with my heart.
She shares it with everyone,
Till it tears me apart.

She loves the attention,
The way she plays with my mind,
Till all the pretend confessions
Have played their essential part,
And I respond in kind.

She loves the attention –
An insult to myself,
And I won’t even mention
How the clock has struck twelve.

She loves the attention,
And why do I care?
She’s the most beautiful thing,
For all the world to share.

Same Old New Thing

It’s a small, silly crush.
But it starts with one crack in the ice,
That spreads and tears in half
A continent of truth and lies:
The heart that I’m trying to keep mine.
But why bother trying when trying is inauthentic?

Feelings aren’t meant to be pragmatic, or rationalised out of existence.
It’s no big deal, but it’s just new to me.
Because normally, hopelessness would accompany attraction.
But now I’m feeling like I’m living the what ifs I may have missed
In the past.
The what ifs that disappeared
When we kissed.

I was on my way to school,
But here I am, thinking of 2am,
When it was just me and you.

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Every Time

I die on the inside every time I decide to leave someone behind.
Or when I lay to rest the plans we never had,
Or the memories we never made
In a future that we will never see
Together.

Together was all we had,
And I find myself here at the end
Of it all, struggling to stand tall
And raise my head high.
Because every goodbye kills me,
And I die every day, afraid
Of the next one to go away.

I’m so fine with it, sometimes,
Somehow, but then there are times
When I’m drowning in the deep depths
Of despair, where the air
Escapes my lungs
And leaves me behind.

Sad Salesman

I sold a smile with zero commission –
It’s the tale of the sad salesman.
Going door to door
On different shores –
So sure that it would be okay.

It was a day to day basis,
And I stayed on this path –
No matter the waves and phases
That I faced.

But it’s time for a career change
And to change my ways.
So that finally I can reach a place
Where instead of chasing the sun –
And its face,
It will smile down to me
And let me breathe
Freely.

A Hair

Written in the morning, at a windy busstop.

I found one of your hairs again,
Clinging desperately to my shirt in the wind.
I remember coming home and finding more
Sticking to my socks because you barely clean your floor;
But they were a part of you
Even when we’d be apart.

I’m going to miss those grumpy groans of yours,
And how your hair would look like loose hay in the morning;
Or those overbearing yawns that sound like a cow just walked into the room.

Every day with you I found something new to love,
Another thing to remember and appreciate.

But now
That chapter has also met its end,
And it’s time for the story to continue.

I pluck the hair off my shirt
And let the wind carry me away.

At Last

The music softly plays,
Its tune flows through the air
As I run my fingers through your hair.

It is my perfect place:
Of peace, comfort, it’s our cocoon
With our hearts beating to the same tune.

Your smell, and love, the trace
Left behind on my shirt and face;
After our far from final, perfect embrace.

Rain Dance

Dancing on the rain
Without a care in the world.
Drop to drop,
Step to step,
In tune with the uncaring clouds,
And the beat of those longing heart strings.

It all leads to you.
And here we are:
Our heads held high,
Facing the sun in the sky;
Basking in the never ending beams of light
That only meet our eyes.